Alexxandra (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
eisbrecher) wrote2010-06-29 03:50 pm
eisbrecher) wrote2010-06-29 03:50 pm
Entry tags:
Writer's Block: Cold turkey
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In my last year of high school, I stopped worrying so much about what people thought of me. I still cared, of course, about my real friends and family, but I went through a lot of bullying and stuff at school that I was constantly only revealing a side of me that would let me be liked by people, people that I didn't even like, and I knew they didn't like me either. Eventually, with the help of my brother, who had never given a shit about people who hated him, I learned to be myself, whether I was liked or hated because of it. I mean, I stopped having the occasional cigarette and drink, because I valued my health and my morals, knowing I was only doing it under peer pressure for people who weren't even my friends, they were just idiots who wanted the power. And I was worse off socially, just because I was not prepared to damage my health or break the law. But I was glad for it, because I finally only hung out with real friends, who liked me whether I was tee-total or not. The whole bullying/peer pressure thing at school gave me really bad confidence issues, which I'm still working out, but I'm glad I didn't decide to continually be someone I wasn't just for the sake of fitting in.
In my last year of high school, I stopped worrying so much about what people thought of me. I still cared, of course, about my real friends and family, but I went through a lot of bullying and stuff at school that I was constantly only revealing a side of me that would let me be liked by people, people that I didn't even like, and I knew they didn't like me either. Eventually, with the help of my brother, who had never given a shit about people who hated him, I learned to be myself, whether I was liked or hated because of it. I mean, I stopped having the occasional cigarette and drink, because I valued my health and my morals, knowing I was only doing it under peer pressure for people who weren't even my friends, they were just idiots who wanted the power. And I was worse off socially, just because I was not prepared to damage my health or break the law. But I was glad for it, because I finally only hung out with real friends, who liked me whether I was tee-total or not. The whole bullying/peer pressure thing at school gave me really bad confidence issues, which I'm still working out, but I'm glad I didn't decide to continually be someone I wasn't just for the sake of fitting in.